Beware of the Trains by Edmund Crispin
After wearing myself out with the #1977club, I was sorely in need of something a bit relaxing and comforting; and my go-to type of book in situations like that is always Golden Age crime. It’s not as if I don’t have plenty to choose from at the moment, but I was nudged in the direction of this collection of short stories by the excellent post at The Reader is Warned Blog.

I thought I had an interesting hardback version – alas, I have an old paperback with crispy pages…..
Edmund Crispin has been a long-time favourite of mine, and I’ve written about him on the Ramblings before. His detective stories, featuring the Oxford Don Gervase Fen as the sleuth, are gems: funny, entertaining, clever and readable, they often push the boundaries and break the fourth wall, which I love – early meta-detective fiction maybe! π I own, and have read, all of his books but it must be decades since I read this collection; and it seemed like the perfect thing to pick up at the moment.
And this is a particularly interesting collection, because the premise with all of these stories is that they are playing fair; i.e. in theory, the reader has all the information the detective has and should be able to solve the puzzle by him or herself! I must admit that I don’t mind being bamboozled – I quite enjoy the author pulling the wool over my eyes – but conversely I *do* quite like the odd occasion I work the plot out.
Anyway, as with most collections of short stories, it’s hard to know quite how much detail to go into; I think I’ll just mention a few of my favourites! The title story is a particularly striking one, which I believe has been anthologised, and the puzzle is the murder of a train driver with the culprit seemingly vanishing into thin air. A Pot of Paint seems breathtakingly simple when the solution to who murdered a householder painting his fence is revealed; but I challenge most readers to come up with the solution! The Name on the Window is a kind of locked room mystery concerning a body found in a summer house with only one way in or out and a single set of footprints which could not have been tampered with in any way. And in The Golden Mean, a short, sharp tale of a very nasty family member, Fen is rattled by meeting with a character who embodies pure evil.
Thinking about it, these tales (often quite brief) are all what you might call impossible crimes and the puzzle element is strong. However, Crispin’s writing is such a joy; I love the humour he laces his stories with, and he’s brilliant at conjuring atmosphere and character efficiently in works that are in many ways minimalist. Fen is often accompanied by Inspector Humbleby, who’s as much of a maverick in the police force as is Fen in the University establishment, and they make a perfect Holmes and Watson team with some wonderful repartee.
Intriguingly, the last two stories in the collection are ones which *don’t* feature Fen, and the final one, Deadlock, is a particularly dark and memorable tale. Despite Crispin’s surface levity with Fen and his various sidekicks, he’s not averse to tackling more downbeat settings or situations, and this tale, set on a remote kind of estuary, was very affecting. Unusually, the story is narrated from the viewpoint of a character who was a teenager at the time of the events; and it’s a little different in feel from Crispin’s more familiar Fen stories.
…the second porter, who was very old indeed … appeared to be temperamentally subject to that vehement, unfocussed rage which one associates with men who are trying to give up smoking.
One of the joys of reading Edmund Crispin, though, is the humour and the in-jokes, and there are plenty of these. The above description of a character from the title story is a perfect example of the kind of thing you get when reading a Fen story, and in another story Crispin manages to drop in reference to a fellow practitioner:
Gideon Fell once gave a very brilliant lecture on The Locked-Room Problem in connection with that business of the Hollow Man….
However, he’s also wonderful at capturing atmosphere and I make no apologies for quoting at length this paragraph that vividly brings to life post-Festival of Britain London:
The gathering darkness was accentuated by a fog which had appeared dispiritedly at about tea-time. Looking across the river, you could no longer make out the half-demolished Festival buildings on the far side; and although October was still young, the sooty trees on the Embankment had already surrendered their stoic green to the first spears of the cold, and there were few homekeeping folk hardy enough to resist the temptation of a fire. Presently, to a servile nation-wide juggling with clocks, Summer Time would officially end. In the meanwhile, it seemed that Nature’s edict had anticipated Parliament’s by a matter of several days; so that more than one belated office-worker, scurrying to catch his bus in Whitehall or the Strand, shivered a little and hunched his shoulders, as he met the cold vapour creeping into London from the Thames…
I’m so glad I chose to pick up this collection at this moment and refresh my love of Crispin and Fen. If I was recommending a book of theirs to start with, I would probably suggest “The Moving Toyshop”, which I think seems to be generally regarded as his masterpiece. However, if you want some short, fiendish and funny puzzles this is a great place to go. I have to agree with Dan at The Reader is Warned that Crispin is vastly underrated as a crime writer; if you have any interest in Golden Age crime (or indeed just good writing generally) you really should read him! π
May 01, 2018 @ 10:19:29
This sounds fantastic; another for the TBR list! I’m so pleased to hear that you enjoyed your reread.
May 01, 2018 @ 10:42:29
Crispin’s definitely worth tracking down – a much-underrated GA crime writer in my opinion!
May 03, 2018 @ 14:37:31
Thankfully my dad owns quite a few of the Vintage reissues of his novels; I borrow them as soon as he’s finished with them!
May 03, 2018 @ 15:07:00
Excellent! You’re in for a treat! π
May 01, 2018 @ 11:25:20
Oooh, you’ve intrigued me! I love The Moving Toyshop and I’ll look out for this or other Crispins.
May 01, 2018 @ 14:07:11
Definitely do! He’s such a marvellous writer!
May 01, 2018 @ 12:22:20
Very tempting, unfortunately I could only find this particular book at a ridiculously high price. But I have found The Moving Toyshop, The case of the Gilded Fly and Buried For Pleasure. If you can think of other good ones…
Have a nice day !
May 01, 2018 @ 13:52:56
Oh dear – I didn’t know this one was hard to get hold of! Despite its crispy pages I obviously need to hold onto it…. Hope you’re day’s going well! π
May 01, 2018 @ 14:06:41
I would say Gilded Fly and Swan Song are Crispin’s best. Those you should be able to get very easily.
May 01, 2018 @ 14:09:23
Now you’re just making me want to read the whole series of Crispin books in order all over again…. π
May 01, 2018 @ 13:57:09
Oh, wow – the quoted paragraphs are bloody brilliant. I generally do a bit of eye-rolling at GA crime, but having discovered Cyril Hare’s An English Murder last Christmas, it’s clear that there are some real gems in the mix. The Moving Toyshop is evidently the place to start with Crispin…
May 01, 2018 @ 14:01:49
He writes wonderfully. He can do atmosphere and humour and often quite dark stuff. And yes – The Moving Toyshop was *my* first Crispin and I can’t recommend it enough!
May 01, 2018 @ 14:06:01
There are so so many good GA books out there Elle! Don’t give up on it yet. As with every genre there is some awful stuff, but the big names are so good,and changed the way fiction is written and read for sure.
May 01, 2018 @ 14:08:54
You’re right – not every GA book is great, but some of them are really fabulous. Definitely worth checking out the big names!
May 01, 2018 @ 14:14:56
We’ve been recommending Cyril Hare left, right and centre, and I thought it was utterly brilliant, so am definitely willing to give it a go!
May 01, 2018 @ 14:15:40
Go! Go! I’ve only read one Hare, but I enjoyed it very much! π
May 01, 2018 @ 16:10:58
If you want any recommendations let me know!
May 01, 2018 @ 17:53:28
Yeah, g’wan! It’s usually me recommending things to other people, so I love having the dynamic reversed every once in a while. Where should I start? (Apart from with The Magic Toyshop, of course.)
May 03, 2018 @ 14:00:19
Amazing. What did you like about Hare? And what do you like out of a piece of fiction/crime?
May 03, 2018 @ 17:36:37
I think I enjoyed the winking-ness of it most of all – Hare’s obvious awareness that he was ticking all the common Golden Age boxes. He also draws characters and conflicts with a subtle hand, which was nice to see, especially the treatment of the young Fascist heir of the house and the horror of everyone else at his political leanings (Hare’s acknowledgment of what it must be like for the Professor, who has escaped just such sentiments in Eastern Europe, to be in the same house as them again, is particularly good, I thought.) As for what I want out of fiction, and more specifically crime fiction, I really just want a writer who can construct a sentence (another thing I enjoyed so much about Cyril Hare); if they’re a stylist, that’s almost better (adore Tana French, for instance), and a focus on motivation and characterisation. (See Tana French again… and although I’ve never read Ruth Ware, I think I’d like her.)
May 01, 2018 @ 14:03:12
So so glad you enjoyed this again, it really is a marvelous and underrated collection! And also glad you enjoyed A Pot of Paint as much as me, I would say that it is an almost perfect detective story. And those quotes!! I remembered everyone as I read it back, such rich writing for such a small page count per story!
I am publishing a review on his later short stories this week, a very different kettle of fish actually.
May 01, 2018 @ 14:08:09
Thanks for the push to re-read! I love Crispin’s writing but forget sometimes how much! And yes – these are *short* stories, but the writing is just so good!
May 01, 2018 @ 16:10:35
Each one could easily have been made into a novel.
May 01, 2018 @ 16:15:16
You’re so right!
May 01, 2018 @ 14:36:44
This does sound just the ticket, indeed!
May 01, 2018 @ 15:57:24
This sounds like a brilliantly entertaining collection. I have yet to read Edmund Crispin, sounds like one I would enjoy.
May 01, 2018 @ 16:00:43
Oooh, I think you should, Ali. I think you would definitely like him! π
May 01, 2018 @ 20:33:15
Wonderful! I really enjoy Crispin but I wondered how it would work with short stories – sounds like he pulls it off with aplomb! I’ll definitely be reading these.
May 01, 2018 @ 20:43:14
He does indeed! Even if you don’t yet know Fen I don’t that’s a problem – and the non-Fen stories work brilliantly too! π
May 01, 2018 @ 22:27:11
What. a fun review! And I’ve really enjoyed Crispin’s books, but have never heard of the story collection. I agree that classic crime, is a relaxing genre. I will look for this one. And I wonder if I’ve read all Crispin’s novels? I probably have missed one or two
May 02, 2018 @ 10:04:13
He’s written several, and I have them all – but I do find myself wondering if there are any uncollected stories? Whatever – these are great!
May 02, 2018 @ 02:06:51
I’ll have to get hold of a copy of this. It sounds like a fine read, and then I shall pass it on to my son who has always loved trains and used to have a t-shirt with ‘Beware of Trains’ emblazoned across it!
May 02, 2018 @ 10:02:49
It’s excellent – the puzzles are great and I just love Gervase Fen. Very appropriate for your son!
May 02, 2018 @ 03:13:03
I turn to Golden Age crime myself for comfort reading (which is kind of funny, when you think about it). I was at the British Library a couple weeks ago and they had a Buy 2 Get 1 Free promotion of the beautifully repackaged British Library Crime Classics which I am annoyed with myself for not taking advantage of. I agonized because I wanted them all but allowed myself to to postpone any purchase as it was my first day and never made it back there. I did buy The Incredible Crime by Lois Austen-Leigh later in my trip although have not read it yet.
May 02, 2018 @ 10:02:23
I’m the same. I think it’s often the setting, and the fact that there is a hideously confused situation which a detective puts to rights for you – most reassuring when real life is chaos! The BL books are lovely, and it’s so hard to choose! Enjoy!
May 02, 2018 @ 08:00:20
It does sound good, an ideal comfort read after the excitement of your club week. I’ve seen a few of Crispin’s books in bookshops recently, so he must be enjoying a bit of a revival.
May 02, 2018 @ 10:00:56
I hope he is, because I think he’s marvellous. And he was just the ticket (ha!) for a relaxing read.
May 02, 2018 @ 08:13:16
The Moving Toyshop has just gone onto my Goodreads wishlist. Though I am trying to wean myself off crime fiction there are times when only crime will fit the need.
May 02, 2018 @ 10:00:28
Agreed – GA crime is astonishingly soothing at times of stress! π
May 03, 2018 @ 19:50:09
The only Crispin I have ever read was dreadful, almost as off-putting as his character Fen! I am glad that your experience has been so much more positive. In my view the GA is probably the last 20 years π
May 03, 2018 @ 19:56:53
Oh dear. Well, it would be dull if we all liked the same books! I’m inordinately fond of Fen – but then I obviously have a weakness for university academics! π
May 05, 2018 @ 04:51:51
So glad to meet a fellow golden age of crime lover. I am glad to learn of this Crispen novel. I’ve only read the Moving Toy Shop and want to find more of his work.
May 05, 2018 @ 13:55:35
He’s definitely an author whose work is worth exploring!
Oct 19, 2018 @ 07:09:34